Comments on: Three Steps to Improve Your Marriage http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/ WealthPilgrim.com - A Journey To Self, Health and Wealth Sat, 11 Feb 2012 14:42:35 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Neal Frankle http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/#comment-3013 Neal Frankle Wed, 23 Dec 2009 08:18:20 +0000 http://wealthpilgrim.com/?p=12576#comment-3013 Financial Samurai, I don't think it's weird at all...I think if you talk about it every three months, it's cool. Just make sure the conversation is open and inviting so if she (or you) have a resentment building, you can air it out. I know you are a smart cookie, so I'm sure you both have a plan and audit to make sure you are advancing towards it. So sounds like you are both on the same page. Nicely done young man! You also get a Pilgrim Pick of the Pack Award! Me likey.... .-= Neal Frankle´s last blog ..<a href="http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/" rel="nofollow">Three Steps to Improve Your Marriage and Finances for Free</a> =-. Financial Samurai,

I don’t think it’s weird at all…I think if you talk about it every three months, it’s cool. Just make sure the conversation is open and inviting so if she (or you) have a resentment building, you can air it out.

I know you are a smart cookie, so I’m sure you both have a plan and audit to make sure you are advancing towards it. So sounds like you are both on the same page. Nicely done young man! You also get a Pilgrim Pick of the Pack Award! Me likey….
.-= Neal Frankle´s last blog ..Three Steps to Improve Your Marriage and Finances for Free =-.

]]> By: Financial Samurai http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/#comment-3012 Financial Samurai Wed, 23 Dec 2009 07:17:15 +0000 http://wealthpilgrim.com/?p=12576#comment-3012 Seems like it's all about being open huh? Neal, do you think that it's weird that my wife and I never have arguments about money? We talk about our plan maybe once every 3 months, but go about with our team saving and spending habits. She works and has her own income of course. Our goals are exactly the same, and that is to retire after 20 years of work and do something completely free and different. .-= Financial Samurai´s last blog ..Playing Until My Knees Swell And Feet Bleed =-. Seems like it’s all about being open huh?

Neal, do you think that it’s weird that my wife and I never have arguments about money? We talk about our plan maybe once every 3 months, but go about with our team saving and spending habits. She works and has her own income of course.

Our goals are exactly the same, and that is to retire after 20 years of work and do something completely free and different.
.-= Financial Samurai´s last blog ..Playing Until My Knees Swell And Feet Bleed =-.

]]> By: admin http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/#comment-3011 admin Tue, 22 Dec 2009 19:03:26 +0000 http://wealthpilgrim.com/?p=12576#comment-3011 You know what Jackie....I wrestled with that "inevitable" part too but the more I thought about it, the more convinced I became. I just think that, left "untreated" the money thing comes between people - even if they don't give voice to it. I could be wrong of course but I feel that if we don't talk about this in an organized way, it creates problems that sometimes come out sideways.... You know what Jackie….I wrestled with that “inevitable” part too but the more I thought about it, the more convinced I became.

I just think that, left “untreated” the money thing comes between people – even if they don’t give voice to it. I could be wrong of course but I feel that if we don’t talk about this in an organized way, it creates problems that sometimes come out sideways….

]]> By: Jackie http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/#comment-3007 Jackie Tue, 22 Dec 2009 16:11:26 +0000 http://wealthpilgrim.com/?p=12576#comment-3007 I think it's going a little far to say that money inevitably comes between most couples -- because it doesn't have to be inevitable -- but I agree that it sure does come between a lot of people. Ignoring that possibilty is asking for trouble. I like your suggested process, and think it would be a good idea for my husband and I to literally go through and try to answer the questions you posed for each other to see where we think we stand. Even though we have a good money relationship, talking about it more won't hurt! .-= Jackie´s last blog ..<a href="http://www.moneycrush.com/money-and-relationships-2/" rel="nofollow">Money and Relationships</a> =-. I think it’s going a little far to say that money inevitably comes between most couples — because it doesn’t have to be inevitable — but I agree that it sure does come between a lot of people. Ignoring that possibilty is asking for trouble.

I like your suggested process, and think it would be a good idea for my husband and I to literally go through and try to answer the questions you posed for each other to see where we think we stand. Even though we have a good money relationship, talking about it more won’t hurt!
.-= Jackie´s last blog ..Money and Relationships =-.

]]> By: karyn http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/#comment-3006 karyn Tue, 22 Dec 2009 13:39:34 +0000 http://wealthpilgrim.com/?p=12576#comment-3006 Excellent! The award is like an early Christmas gift (or late Hanukkah gift). I guess I need to remember that I have chosen to have kids and have chosen to stay at home with them - and appreciate my blessings instead of worrying so much! Excellent! The award is like an early Christmas gift (or late Hanukkah gift). I guess I need to remember that I have chosen to have kids and have chosen to stay at home with them – and appreciate my blessings instead of worrying so much!

]]> By: neal@wealthpilgrim http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/#comment-2999 neal@wealthpilgrim Tue, 22 Dec 2009 03:34:37 +0000 http://wealthpilgrim.com/?p=12576#comment-2999 Karyn, Sounds like a good compromise. Also sounds like you are doing a really good job under a tough circumstance. You get the Pilgrim Pick of the Pack Award this week!!!! .-= neal@wealthpilgrim´s last blog ..<a href="http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/" rel="nofollow">Three Steps to Improve Your Marriage and Finances for Free</a> =-. Karyn,

Sounds like a good compromise. Also sounds like you are doing a really good job under a tough circumstance. You get the Pilgrim Pick of the Pack Award this week!!!!
.-= neal@wealthpilgrim´s last blog ..Three Steps to Improve Your Marriage and Finances for Free =-.

]]> By: karyn http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/#comment-2998 karyn Mon, 21 Dec 2009 23:22:43 +0000 http://wealthpilgrim.com/?p=12576#comment-2998 I guess what's bugging me is that things are so tight - but that's life with four kids and a single income and working for a school system! That's why blogs like these are so helpful - they help me keep my "eyes on the prize". Maybe the middle ground would be to only allow myself to bring up finances once a week and ask my husband to listen for just that once a week rant! Thanks Neal! I guess what’s bugging me is that things are so tight – but that’s life with four kids and a single income and working for a school system! That’s why blogs like these are so helpful – they help me keep my “eyes on the prize”. Maybe the middle ground would be to only allow myself to bring up finances once a week and ask my husband to listen for just that once a week rant! Thanks Neal!

]]> By: Neal@Wealth Pilgrim http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/#comment-2996 Neal@Wealth Pilgrim Mon, 21 Dec 2009 19:25:32 +0000 http://wealthpilgrim.com/?p=12576#comment-2996 Joel...right. That's why a conversation like the one I've suggested might be useful. Talk about when you aren't heated. I also battle w/the status quo and I think it's like exercise. My status quo is munching Honey Nut Cherrios on the couch.....but is it good for me? Joel…right. That’s why a conversation like the one I’ve suggested might be useful.

Talk about when you aren’t heated. I also battle w/the status quo and I think it’s like exercise.

My status quo is munching Honey Nut Cherrios on the couch…..but is it good for me?

]]> By: Neal@WealthPilgrim http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/#comment-2994 Neal@WealthPilgrim Mon, 21 Dec 2009 16:33:46 +0000 http://wealthpilgrim.com/?p=12576#comment-2994 Karyn, (comment #3) You bring up a fascinating point. On the one hand, things seem to be going well and you don't end up changing much so I can see your husband's point. On the other hand, something seems to be bugging you - and that's always worth discussing. I guess the middle ground that occurs to me is to work out - on paper - what the goals are and what you both need to do in order to be on track towards those goals. If you aren't hitting the milestones, then, there is something to talk about. If you hit the milestones but yet still have more you want to discuss....it could be that you have other goals you haven't expressed. Is that possible? .-= Neal@WealthPilgrim´s last blog ..<a href="http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/" rel="nofollow">Three Steps to Improve Your Marriage and Finances for Free</a> =-. Karyn, (comment #3)

You bring up a fascinating point.

On the one hand, things seem to be going well and you don’t end up changing much so I can see your husband’s point.

On the other hand, something seems to be bugging you – and that’s always worth discussing.

I guess the middle ground that occurs to me is to work out – on paper – what the goals are and what you both need to do in order to be on track towards those goals.

If you aren’t hitting the milestones, then, there is something to talk about. If you hit the milestones but yet still have more you want to discuss….it could be that you have other goals you haven’t expressed.

Is that possible?
.-= Neal@WealthPilgrim´s last blog ..Three Steps to Improve Your Marriage and Finances for Free =-.

]]> By: karyn http://wealthpilgrim.com/three-steps-to-improve-your-marriage-and-finances-for-free/#comment-2993 karyn Mon, 21 Dec 2009 15:24:36 +0000 http://wealthpilgrim.com/?p=12576#comment-2993 I think this process would be helpful for me but I don't think my husband would want to do it. We have very similar spending habits and goals and fortunately we don't argue much about money. Our difficulty is that I want to over analyze our finances and my husband wants to "under analyze" them. I feel like talking about our situation helps me feel less stressed (since I'm the one who deals with the finances the most); he points out that they don't change that much so why keep rehashing the same issue. I think we're both right and there's a middle ground - but we haven't found it yet. I think this process would be helpful for me but I don’t think my husband would want to do it. We have very similar spending habits and goals and fortunately we don’t argue much about money. Our difficulty is that I want to over analyze our finances and my husband wants to “under analyze” them. I feel like talking about our situation helps me feel less stressed (since I’m the one who deals with the finances the most); he points out that they don’t change that much so why keep rehashing the same issue. I think we’re both right and there’s a middle ground – but we haven’t found it yet.

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