Comments on: The Undiscovered Best Wedding Present Ever – For Free

By: Carnival of Debt Reduction: Waffle Iron Day edition | Mighty Bargain Hunter

Carnival of Debt Reduction: Waffle Iron Day edition | Mighty Bargain Hunter — Tue, 30 Jun 2009 06:26:56 +0000

[...] Pilgrim shares the best, and cheapest, wedding present you can give [...]

By: My Journey

My Journey — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 16:42:20 +0000

I don’t think it is the talk that is the problem vs. a gift from someone. I had about 200 people at my wedding (small for NY standards), and I would probably be annoyed if 90% of the people tried to have that talk with me.

So I guess your advice on carefully introducing it would be appropriate. Also, make sure you are “allowed” to talk – for instance my parents SHOULD NOT be the ones to have that talk with me, whereas, her parents might be good to go.

By: Neal

Neal — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 15:09:05 +0000

Mattwi & Phil,

You’re probably right……if you live with someone for awhile…you’ll know more about them than any financial statement can tell you….

MJ,
First, congratulations on your anniversary! Based on our interactions you didn’t need the talk…..the check probably was a much better gift.

I think “the talk” would have to be introduced very carefully to make sure the lovebirds are open to having it.

I do know that the source of most fights are finances. If “the talk” isn’t appropriate, do you think there is another way to help couples avoid these problems?

By: My Journey

My Journey — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 14:43:33 +0000

Neal I am usually with you, but I couldn’t disagree more with you (and that rarely happens).

I got married about a year ago (just celebrated in Newport, RI) – and if someone attempted to sit down with me to talk about this stuff I would think they are simply NUTS.

Maybe its my generation, maybe its where I am from, maybe its how I was raised – but unless they are a close family member, I’d rather take the check lol.

By: Phil

Phil — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 13:16:08 +0000

I moved in with my future wife for a year before I even asked her to marry me. We got through the money talk over the course of four or five conversations.

Now, we have a budget spreadsheet, know where all our money is going, and pay bills together.

But we had the money talk long before we got those good habits.

By: Mattwi

Mattwi — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 12:10:32 +0000

On the surface it might be a good idea, but what most couples tend to do these days, is move in together before they are even engaged. I can only see that swapping statements etc. would potentialy cause a lot of aggro, and if you’ve been living with someone for a while, then you should already know what their spending habits are like. Perhaps the bigger issue is whether you partner is honest with you, (about everything else, as well as money).