This frugal life I’ve been writing about on the blog is important. In fact, ever since I started writing this blog, I’ve been trying to promote the virtues of frugality.
“How to lease a car cheap.” This is one of many posts I’ve written to help you save money.
I haven’t changed my mind about these things but I did have a unforeseen shift in attitude recently.
My eldest daughter came home and we had a wonderful 10 day quasi-vacation. She’s been in the Army for the last 3 years. We don’t see her that often so when she’s here we celebrate.
We didn’t spend a ton of money on our vacation but we did let our hair down a little. We went camping at the beach, spent a day in San Diego, went to the movies and ate out a few times. We bought clothes for her and ourselves and other supplies too.
As you know, I’m a big believer in monthly budgeting. While I didn’t have a budget for these items in June, I do make a yearly allowance for recreation so we could easily afford our family vacation. But the truth is I would have done everything we did even if we hadn’t budgeted for it. This was a big shift for me and quite frankly, I took myself by surprise.
I just didn’t care all that much about the money we were spending. I didn’t think about the money. Not at all.
While we were together, I was just in a constant state of gratitude for my wife and daughters and the life I have.
Now, keep in mind that I didn’t rent out Dodger Stadium or buy my kid a Faberge Egg. But we all did what we wanted to do when we wanted to do it. When we were in doubt about spending or buying something, we did it. We erred on the side of spending vs saving.
And you know what? It was the right approach.
This mode of behavior is counter to my nature. I look for value in almost every decision I make. (I’m not into couponing but I did write a post about a company that is. Read What is Groupon to learn more.) In the past, I’ve had this allergic reaction when my family goes outside our budget. I’ve lived for years with the fear that if they spend “unconsciously” we’ll never get back on track. I then paint all kinds of doomsday scenarios that have nothing to do with reality or my experience with my wife and kids.
That is my nuttiness and thank goodness and I have a wonderful wife who can lovingly point this out to me.
I share this story with you for a few reasons. The main idea I think is that there are times to be super vigilant and there are times to be carefree. By being aware of my spending during the day-to-day (something I’m good at) I have a shot to enjoy the things that really matter in life without worrying about the money (something I’m working on).
Enjoy your summer.
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{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
First: Thank you to your daughter for serving. I can only imagine how difficult it is to not have her nearby. Second: sometimes you have to throw the budget away for a week or so to enjoy your family. Same with a funeral. And you don’t have to spend loads of money, sometimes just having a bbq is the best thing.
Thanks for this! I, too, struggle to stop watching every nickel. I recently bought my bike-crazy son a really decent bike (brand new!) from a local bike shop owned by a neighbor. My instinct was to keep on looking for garage sale bargains, but this time? The frugal choice wasn’t the right decision. He loves his bike, and his pride and willingness to take care of it? Worth every cent – even if they had to be pried out of my hands!
Right on Nancy. I know you “get it”.
Abby….NICE!!!!!!! Your son will never forget that bike and the character he is building will pay big dividends. Thanks.
Neal
Neal completely agree on this one. It’s important to have a plan and a budget, and also a plan when you need to exceed your budget. I have a variety of categories that are sinking funds where I’m carrying balances for when things occur, car repair, Christmas, vacation. So when I need to do something like you did, I can and we readjust the following month. A little buffer is a good thing.
Neal – You went on vacation! Am shocked…but relieved that you are human. I agree that it is essential to spend in a carefree manner during certain times – graduation, coming home (from Army, in your case), a celebration of some sort – but it is the budgeting that is the most difficult thing to do and which I am trying to teach my boys. My oldest just graduated from college, so I will pass on your words of wisdom…maybe you can blog about the monthly budget idea in a more specific manner that I can pass on to him.
Thanks Rich,
People who sign up for email delivery of the blog get a very detailed discussion and action list on taming the budget beast.
Check that out and encourage your sign to work those steps. I think he’ll be amazed at the results.
Neal:
Had you not budgeted for many years, been frugal and made sure that you obtained value for all the dollars you spent before this vacation, you would not have been able to “let go”.
With all due respect, I believe the message should be a little more specific, its OK to be carefree only after you have earned it.
Lastly, on behalf of my kids and their future, please extend our appreciation to your daughter for her commitment to serve our Nation.
.-= LeanLifeCoach´s last blog ..You can never earn enough, so quit trying! =-.
LLC,
I’d have to agree w/your comments. I think your point should indeed be articulated and emphasized. We’ve put in the work, let’s enjoy a little…..right?